Sunday, June 28, 2015

Legalist


You’re free, he said, and snapped the shackles on.
You see, he said, your debt is paid; your sin is gone.
And now, there’s only one thing you must do:
Endure these chains, and thus maintain his love for you.

Our master is a kindly one, he said
His employ isn’t something you can earn; it’s just a gift instead.
But his affection, that’s a different thing:
It’s only for the few who keep the rules for following.

Sure, he already suffered for your gain;
Willingly laid down his life, imbibed your pain.
But gratitude demands you languish, too
And thus allay the payment he so freely made for you.

You’re not his servant, really, but his son  
Accepted irrevocably; it cannot be undone  
But still he’ll snub you if you slip or fail
By messing up the way you sing or how you wear your hair.

Of course, his yoke is easy, and his burden light
Just trust him with your all; he’ll make your days be sunny, bright
But, God forbid you stumble on the way;
Cause then he’ll turn his face and make you pay.

No matter that he bids you rest in grace!
It doesn’t really mean to rest: it means pick up the pace
Create a testimony that will brightly glow
To hide the weak, dependent soul his loving light would show.

Yes, gaze on him, but watch yourself – beware
Of losing sight of regulation in the beauty of his care.
His liberation merits strictest gratitude, most cautious song;
After all, you’re free, he said, and snapped the shackles on. 


Thursday, June 25, 2015

Psalm 8

This one's from seven years ago today: a long, rambling, reflections-on-a-Psalm-rewritten-as-a-poem inspired by a sermon on the title passage, Psalm 8. It was intended as a song, with three eight-line verses and an eight-line chorus. I'm bad at titles, so even after all this time, this poem doesn't really have one. Suggestions are always welcome. And hopefully, my writing style has become more concise with time.

Psalm 8

He spoke the worlds into existence,
Hung the stars up with his hand;
Painted heaven with his fingers,
Shaped the galaxies with his command.

He formed the earth and moved upon it,
Made all living things we see -
Sheep and cattle, birds and fishes,
Feeb'lest grass and tallest mighty tree.

Though I was made to know my Maker,
Sin forbade my drawing near.
God of power soon would judge me:
Guilt and shame o'erwhelmed my heart with fear.

And yet, this mighty God, Creator
Chose to take a servant's dress:
Came to earth; in love and mercy,
Clothed me in his perfect righteousness.

His Word upholds what he created;
Countless mighty stars still flame,
Seasons come and go, enabled
By sustaining power of his Name.

How can I fail to trust my Father?
He who owns eternity
Gives me ought but what love chooses.
Mercy's hands of strength are holding me.

Oh Lord our Lord, your Name is mighty -
Excellent in all the earth.
What is man that you would love me,
Visit me, and bring to me new birth?

All glory, honor, highest praises
Ever more we give to you
God, Creator, Lord Almighty
Faithful, righteous, merciful and true.



Monday, June 8, 2015

3 AM

His little wrist rests
against my finger

Wide blue eyes no longer cry, but hide, tired,
beneath gold-auburn lashes

As eager lips slurp nourishment
cleft chin pressed against my breast

Precious baby boy!
his mother's joy, his father's pride

Daddy's eyes and mama's hair -
two souls mingled, manifested in his little life.

The wild world waits to be explored:
ideas, places, so much more for him to know -

For me to help him learn
to help him grow, strong and bold, wise and kind

But, for now, he sighs, and falls asleep
well-fed, content, secure

Sure of all he needs right now:
wrapped up in lavish love.



Thursday, June 4, 2015

Arrogance?

When God made humans, he made them as a reflection of himself. He wove worth into every aspect of their personhood. Thus, each individual possesses a unique ability to glorify the Creator by evidencing his image in his or her life.

This is what sets humans apart from animals. It is the foundation for human law and culture. It is the argument against cruelty and for politeness, for mutual respect, for helping others. It's why we create things that go beyond merely supporting survival: things that are enjoyable for their own sake: things like delicious food, pretty clothes, expressive music. It is why racism is not ok, why euthanasia is not ok, why abortion is not ok. 

And it is why disparaging oneself is not ok.

For some reason, many Christians believe that speaking negatively of themselves is a virtue. I was raised to believe that. I remember as a child mocking a song which included the lyrics “I’m somebody: I’m created in the image of God, and I’m somebody… I am loved, and I’m his child, I’m important to him.” To my warped sensibilities, this song was the height of arrogance. Who am I to say that I am important?

But God says that I am important. God says I am made in his image, and valuable - so valuable, he sent his Son to redeem me from my feelings of worthlessness. For me to deny this, and to insist on degrading myself by continually referring to myself as a “horrific wretch” - for me to joke that if God really knew what I was going to be like, he would never have saved me - for me to say "oh, I am actually not very good at that" when someone asks me about a real ability that I have been given - for me to do these things is for me to mock my Creator. It is to disagree with his very words, and to focus on myself instead of on what he declares is true.

Three and a half years ago, with these thoughts in mind, I wrote this poem. 


Arrogance?

Arrogance?
To recognize inherent beauty
implanted in a soul
crafted in the image of the Sovereign?

To nod acknowledgement: 
I am
capable
gifted
enabled for a purpose
of glory to my Maker?

Arrogance?
To exude confidence:
I am
treasure
worthwhile
unique
modeled specifically
by a flawless intentional
Hand?

Do I believe
in what 
His Word declares
I am?

Sin-riddled, 
yes, but ransomed. 
Image of God distorted
yet being restored
continually.

If so, 
as such
I dare not bury
Truth 
beneath a guise of lowliness.
To deny is to despise
reality:

He loves me
for the value
He has woven through my soul. 

Acknowledgment of inner beauty - 
Arrogance? 
Or true humility. 



(c) 2011 Janice Brown. All Rights Reserved. 


Monday, June 1, 2015

On Writing - (or, not)


I've been creating poetry for several years now, and I have shared a lot of my pieces with the general public. A few have been published in print, recorded as songs, or both. However, many many more have never managed to climb out of my drafts box and into the completed folder. Of course, there are many factors that contribute to this, but the hugest one is the feeling that finishing a piece isn't worth the effort: someone else has already written on that topic, after all, and why should I expend energy on something that won't be perfect or entirely original, anyways? This line of reasoning forgets that there is value in the creative process, and that writing is as much about examining and organizing my own thoughts as it is about sharing them with others. 

I started this blog as incentive to myself to choose to write more consistently - to make the time to work through the drafts file and make more of my creations share-ready. One month and only one post in, I wrote this short free-verse as an expression of my ongoing internal fight to write. 

(Sidenote: this goes so far beyond just my interaction with my writing. It's about how I think: about how I interact with the world around me. It's about choosing to notice the beauty that is always a part of the ordinary, and recognizing that emotions are worthwhile, even if they seem awfully inconvenient sometimes.)

Pragdealist

Two sides fight inside my soul
A poet, one – the other,
Charming, simple cynic

Rational, restricted realist
Wrestles daily
Dreamer, visions raw and restless

Callous, cryptic, calculated
Strives to strangle
Perceptive, reflexive, empathetic

Entrenched in aspirations of excellence,
Perfectionism, effective,
Quenches senses yearning for expression.